Tuesday, February 5, 2008

Say What?...and then my jaw dropped.

For those in a hurry...here is the abridged edition. (for a more comprehensive edition continue reading):
DH told me yesterday that he has been laid off of work effective the end of this month. He'll get 6 week severance pay.
Company downsizing.
YIKES!
Need advice on budgeting...and on sticking to a budget.
Did I already say YIKES?????


Here is the long winded version:
Yesterday, I got a call from DH. He said to me "You'll never guess what just happened." Mind you he said this with a quiet voice, not an excited enthuastic voice, so I knew that the ensuing dialogue was not going to be happy. However, what he proceeded to tell me left me with my mouth agape, and truly speechless. (which for me is quite a feat)

When I didn't bother taking a guess (after all he had just told me that I would never guess...so why bother) he went on to tell me that he had just been laid off of work. Not fired, laid off. While I understand that there is a distinction between the two (and for the purposed of explaining what happened to Elle and Sport, it is an important distinction) the results are the same. As of the end of this month, he will no longer be employed at his current job. They're giving him 6 weeks of severance pay, which I guess means in essence that he will continue to receive his paycheck for another 10 weeks. YIKES!

At this point in time DH is optimistic that he will be able to find another job before his paychecks run out. In fact the HR person at his place of employment asked him to bring in his resume and that she would work with him on any changes that need to be made to it. In addition, the HR person said that she will try to help him find a new job...possibly with the same company, in a different department.

I spoke with DH this afternoon and he has been very busy making phone calls and putting the word out that he is looking for a new job. I am glad, that for today a least, he believes that he will be able to get another job soon...and I hope that he is right. When we were first married, DH used to freelance. There were times that he would be on "hiatus" but know that he would have the same job back when the new season started. (During those breaks he was able to enjoy the time off, knowing that he had a job waiting for him) There were other times that the show that he was working on was cancelled...those breaks were filled with looking for work and stressing out that he'd never find another job. The stress level at those times was palpable.

Fortunately during the times that my DH was 'seasonal' we didn't have children, I worked full time plus I also had a private practice in the afternoons. Money was flowing quite freely during those times and his lack of income was just a blip on our radar.

Now we have two children, I work part time and while I am already taking on a full-time caseload, during my part-time hours (for extra money) the lack of DH's paycheck is a huge speed-bump on our radar. The thought of him not having a job (or a paycheck) is actually a huge, big deal on many level...the money level and his mental welfare (mine too).


I have lots of thoughts on this matter. I will save them for another post, once I am able to collect them and put them down to paper. In the meantime, I realize that I need to develop a budget, to prepare for a possibly worse case senario. Over the years I've developed many budgets...I'm just not sure how to stick to them. Food shopping/planning is the hardest for me...I just don't get how to make a shopping list (that would mean that I know what I want to make for dinner more than 5 minutes before I start cooking). Usually every afternoon finds me running to the store for whatever items I need for dinner that night. I realize that this is not at all time or cost efficient and with my DH's impending loss of income, it will not be a wise thing to continue to do.



Does anyone have any suggestions or helpful ideas...they would be greatly appreciated.

16 comments:

Marshamlow said...

I am so sorry. I am keeping you and your family in my prayers.

I find that if I start the week by making a menu of the dinners we will have for the entire week. From the menu I make a list of all the food items I will need. I go to the store one time for the whole week and I save tons of money.

But, I never have been able to do this more than maybe one week per month. I tend to decide what to cook and then go to the store.

Sometimes it is helpful to keep a list of every penny spent for the entire month, stick it in a spread sheet just to see where the money goes. I always thought we were spending so much on food, but it turned out our money mostly goes to other things.

I cannot even imagine how shocking this must be for you.

the moose buyer said...

I will pray that he will find something before he is even finished with this job. We have to have faith!! Good things happen to good people and you two are the best.

Pam said...

Wow, Lynn... I'm so sorry. I sure know what you're going through, except for us at least it's just the two of us now, aside from helping our daughter with college expenses, etc.

I'm guessing your husband will, indeed, find work before the severance runs out, but get the paperwork filed for unemployment early -- the first day of being umemployed, just to have it ready to go. It won't be as much as his paycheck, but it might help if it comes to that.

Have him take advantage of all services offered -- resume updating, job placement, etc. offered by his company. You never know where a connection or lead might come from.

Let as many people -- friends, family, acquaintances -- know what's going on. Again, you never know where a good lead will come from.

I don't know what your husband's field is, but are there head hunting agencies available to assist him? Joe has found these to be invaluable in the past, though the market in his field is a bit slow right now.

Hang in there. It's going to be a bumpy ride. But you every day you just wake up and do what you have to do and eventually this too shall pass.

Again, I'm really sorry, Lynn... If you want to chat further, you can email me (my email's on my profile)..

Many, many hugs. And prayers that he will find a new job SOON.

(p.s. Might I also suggest a "Wild Thing" button for your kitchen?
;-)

Patti said...

I'm so sorry to read this, Lynn.
We have had plenty of experience with this kind of thing. More than enough. Ralph lost a job just weeks before we got married.
Anyway, you can e-mail Ralph (address is on his profile). and he and/or I can give you ideas.

We'll keep you in our prayers.

Mary said...

Lynn,

I'm so sorry this has happened. It seems it's happening to a lot of people these days, though I know that is little consolation. Here are a few tips:

Don't eat out. It is very costly.

Don't buy anything that is NOT absolutely necessary.

Write down EVERYTHING you spend. Even $1.00. Keep receipts and use a journal, or even your Word Program. Once you see what you are spending your money on, you will be surprised.

Buy groceries only ONCE a week. Bread and milk excepted. Extra dollars are spent by running to the grocery store daily.

Make a list of things that you use on a regular basis. Buy salad, fruit, produce etc. If you want baked goods, bake them.

Plan what type of meat you need for the next week. Buy it all at once and put it in the freezer.

Whatever is in your freezer, use up and add it to your list.

These are just a few tips. Hope this helps.

Blessings and prayers for your family.
Mary

Michele said...

I'm sorry Lynn... I really am and I know how you feel. When I was laid off the day after Christmas, I was terrified as well. I still have not found work and it's tough. Most people will not hire me even though my seizures are controlled with meds in fear I "might have one"... they don't want me to be a liability. *sigh*

It's a whole new way of living when you are used to 2 people making money. You learn to cook from scratch, wash dishes by hand more than using a dishwasher, put on a sweator instead of cranking up the heat, etc... it's the little things in life you take advantage of when you think have more money until it's finally taken away.
I pray that life gets back on track for you soon... be strong. It sounds as if something is waiting there for you guys already... that's good :)

Take care.
((Hug))

Renee Nefe said...

I don't think that I can add too much to what has already been suggested...although I've found that buying the larger packages of meat and then portioning them out when I get them home to be helpful. Oh wait a minute! You are vegeterians. Scratch that!

Hummm veggies can be expensive, but try to buy in season. Lentils and stuff are usually fairly reasonable in price.

I found that when my Mom was here that it was helpful to plan a menu. I always make meals intended to last for two nights so all I have to do is heat it up on night two...If I'm thinking right I get it so the leftovers are on nights when I'm busy. Check the pantry and try to use what you already have. Stock up when you see items you use on sale.

Best of luck, we're all praying for you.

Anonymous said...

I read your post on Sari's site, and given your circumstances (needing a smile), I'm positive that you would love this post from just a couple of days ago: http://mrs4444.blogspot.com/2008/02/truth-hurts-sometimes.html

I'll keep your family in my prayers...

Leanne said...

Hugs.

This is stressful. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers that hubby will find something soon.

The only way I've found to save money is through my lists. If I go to the grocery store everyday I do spend ALOT more. Make a list and stick to it. Just tell yourself it won't be for long....

Good Luck!

Mary said...

Lynn,

Thanks for commenting on the fan that I made Mom for Valentine's Day. These are very easy to make and cost very little. Homemade gifts are so much more precious. If you make one, please post photos.

Blessings,
Mary

meno said...

Oh, that is depressing. The other suggestions have been great. I have nothing else for you except good thoughts.

jaded said...

First: "Sorry" sounds inadequate at the moment..

Since planning meals in advance isn't really your "thing", try planning three or four a week, that allow for leftovers. Keep a few staples on hand for quick meals, so you want be as tempted to pick up fast food when you're out.

And like someone else said do write down everything you spend so you know what your spending weaknesses are.

Ralph said...

I have lost more than one job, and of course, it still gets very old each time. I will be running out of unemployment, and of course, the mortgage holder still wants their money by the 16th of the month. My recent post on this subject says it all about having faith...and that's true. But I get discouraged sometimes, and have to work extra hard to be upbeat, and that's work. Have faith in your abilities and the almighty...things will work out, although in ways you wouldn't necessarily expect

Lynanne said...

I can't think of anything other than what has been already suggested. I'm so sorry to hear about this! I hope that he finds a better job and soon!

Lynn said...

Marshamlow - Today I went to the grocery store and actually purchased items for tonights mean...and tomorrow nights meal. This was quite a big accomplishment for me. I am hoping that this weekend, I will be able to plan 3 meals for next week...gasp.

The Moose Buyer - Thanks... I hope that is true.

Pam - Thanks for the advice about having his application for unemployment filled out and ready to go...I will pass that info on to DH. We are trying to remain optimistic...but it's scary. I know that you know what I mean.

Patti - Knowing what you and Ralph are going through, and that you are surviving it, is really helping keep me from totally freaking out. No guaranteed how I will be feeling 1 week from now...or 1 month from now if this continues, but for now DH and I are scared, but O.K.

Mary - You have offered some great suggestions. My daughter Elle and I have already decided that we are going to look through some recipes, this weekend, and plan out our meals for next week. I like you idea about keeping a journal of what I am spending. It will certainly help hold me accountable.

Michele - When someone loses their job and income is cut in half, it really does force you to simplify things...that may not be such a bad thing.

Renee - I noticed when I went to the store today that pasta was on sale. Reminds me of being in college and eating lots and lots of pasta (cause it was cheap). Now if I could just feel that young again, it might be worth it:~)

Half-Past Kissin' Time - Welcome to my blog, and thanks for coming by to offer me a laugh. I really enjoyed your post:~)

Leanne - I am the queen of list making...when it comes to what I need to do in a day. However, I have a hard time conceptualizing what food I will need for a weeks worth of meals. That makes making a list really hard...but I am working on it. I know that I have to change my cooking mindset from 'one day at a time' to 'one week at a time'. sigh

Mary - You can be sure that if I make one, I will definitely post a photo...I really thought that it was such a creative idea:~)

Meno - Good thoughts are greatly appreciated...especially if you don't charge for them. lol

Patches - I purchased stuff for two days worth of meals (plus I know that they'll be left-overs) while I was at the store today. I am quite proud of myself. I figure that there is nothing wrong with progress in small increments.

Ralph - Both my DH and I have a deep and strong belief that this has happened for a reason. We are hopeful that there is something better just around the corner. Like you and Patti, we hope that the something better comes sooner rather than later.

Lynanne - You and me both.

Anonymous said...

So sorry to hear this. I hope your husband is able to find something right away. It's an awful lot of stress.