Since I've had my foot surgery, my podiatrist signed off for me to get a temporary handicap parking placard. I've really needed it these past few weeks, as walking for even a short distance is difficult (my almost 88 year old mother walks faster than I do these days...sigh). I've decided that there are a lot of people on this planet who need to experience first hand what it feels like to look for a handicap parking spot only to find that they are all taken : (
Dear Bitch in the Lin.coln Navi.gator,
I want to thank you for your thoughtlessness the other night. Clearly the fact that you drive a big-ass SUV means that you are absolutely allowed to park in as many spaces as you want. In fact, your parking job was so thoughtless that I think that you should teach a class to other self-involved bitches instructing them on the proper technique for taking at least two parking spaces, and for making sure that one of them is a handicap parking space. My daughter and I especially enjoyed how you walked out of the store and got into your car without any apology to me for taking up the one spot that I needed to park in. That's right, the one that was painted blue with a white wheelchair on it. I must have missed your placard.
I want you to know that I am looking forward to the day when you need to park in that spot, and some other self-involved bitch makes it impossible.
BTW, in the State of California, the fine for parking in a handicap parking spot, when you don't have a placard is...$250-$500 for the for the first offense...of course, seeing how thoughtless you are, I'm thinking that you have already worked your way up to 3+ offenses at the cost of $750-$1,000 each. Please remit your check to any DMV office.
Limping along slowly